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All Aboard The Lazy Train

, , , , | Working | December 19, 2021

I am the youngest guy in the department by at least twenty years. Because of that, I “get” to train up the new employees coming in; I have a lot more patience.

We have two new guys start. They seem to know each other. Both are around twenty, both think they know it all already, and both don’t seem to want to listen.

I’m teaching them how to check the parts, and one turns to me.

New Guy #1: “Look, I think we can figure this out by ourselves.”

Me: “I’m sure you can, but if you don’t quite get it right and the next guy doesn’t pick up your mistake, it will travel all around the line and be worked on for five hours before reaching the end of the line and being thrown away.”

New Guy #1: “Come on, it’s obvious. Look, do it like this, yeah?”

Me: “Yes, good. But do it like that every time. And not so quickly.”

New Guy #2: “I’ll be next in line, so I will be checking it, anyway, yeah?”

Me: “Yes, so you need to understand what he is doing just as much as he does.”

New Guy #1: “Look, we get it, okay?”

I mark them as trained and get them to sign as such. The old department manager checks up on them and notes that they are working well — really well, in fact. They are faster than most of the other guys already. This seems a little suspicious, so I check up on them.

Surprise, surprise, they are quick only because they have ignored everything I told them to do.

Me: “What the h***? Why aren’t you checking the parts?”

New Guy #2: “Chill out. There hasn’t been an issue all week.”

Me: “So? You’re paid to make and check the parts. It’s your job!”

New Guy #1: “Well, [Department Manager] seems to be fine with us. What is your job, anyway?”

New Guy #2: “Yeah, piss off. We don’t need you telling us what to do.”

Fine, you want to be that way? I grab the department manager and head back to the line. The new guys seem unfazed by us.

New Guy #1: “Hey, boss, everything okay?”

New Guy #2: “We were just double-checking these parts.”

Department Manager: “[My Name] says you haven’t been doing your job properly.”

New Guy #1: “Don’t listen to him; he doesn’t know what he is talking about.”

New Guy #2: “Yeah, you said it yourself: we are some of the best workers here. What does he know?”

Department Manager: He wrote the majority of the processes for this line and I trust his judgment completely. Consider yourself on your last warning.”

[New Guy #1] got fired the very next week — something about missing items and him being the prime suspect. [New Guy #2] lasted a little longer, but he clearly couldn’t do anything properly or to a process, so he was told to quit or be fired a few weeks later.

Looks like I “get” to train up two new guys. Lucky me!

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