Aged But Unfiltered

(My grandmother lives on the other side of the world from me, but we’ve always been fond of each other and chat every few weeks. She’s also known in my family for having no filter—she says exactly what she thinks, and is bad at sugar-coating.)

Grandmother: “I’m excited to come visit next month and see your college!”

Me: “And celebrate my birthday with me.”

Grandmother: “Yes, that too, but travel is not so easy for me.”

Me: “I can imagine. You did just turn 80.”

Grandmother: “Yeah.”

Me: “And can you believe I’m about to turn 20?”

*silence*

Me: *panicking, thinking she’s had a heart attack* “Oma? Oma? Oh my god, are you still there?”

Grandmother: “…good god, you’re old.”