Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Listen To This

(This takes place when I am about thirteen. My sister likes a band and talks about them a lot.)

Sister: “A band in the Midwest is playing tonight, wanna go?”

Me: “What band?”

Sister: “A band in the Midwest.”

Me: “What band?”

(This goes on longer than I’d like to admit, with me getting more and more frustrated that she won’t tell me the name of the band.)

Me: “What is the name of the band?”

Sister: “The band’s name is A Band in the Midwest!“

Me: “Why the hell did they name their band A Band in the Midwest if they live in Florida?”

Sister: “Wait, you thought I was saying A Band in the Midwest? I was saying Abandon the Midwest.”

(I felt very stupid that in the months of hearing my sister talk about this band, I’d never realized what she’d really been saying. Every time she’d say Abandon the Midwest, I’d hear “a band in the Midwest” and wonder why she cared so much about some band in a different part of the country when she wouldn’t ever say their name!)