A Young Dad Is Better Than Nothing!

Several years ago, I dated an older lady who I had met doing a project together in one of my college classes. She had a lovely and charming eight-year-old daughter whose smile would make anyone’s heart melt.

I particularly felt sorry for her because she never got to meet her dad, who is serving a forty-to-life sentence as a habitual felon. This loss in her life definitely would show when she would do things like ask me to drop her off and pick her up at school or make a point of standing next to me and holding my hand at gatherings where other children were present with their parents. Other times, while answering the phone, she’d say, “No, I think that was my dad who called you. I’ll go get him,” and then run and hand me the phone.

Despite knowing zero about parenting or mentoring, I did my best to bond with her by playing her silly little games with her, letting her come along with me when I’d go hang out with friends, and listening to her yammer about her girly online games even though I had absolutely no clue what she was talking about.

Then, one day, I was in a bookstore getting some items rung up, and I asked the cashier if she could pull up my discount membership account since I had misplaced my card. She asked for a driver’s license for verification. As she was examining my information, the little girl pranced up to the counter and grabbed my hand.

Girl: *Proudly* “He’s my dad!”

I smiled warmly at her… while I felt my face turn four shades of red as the cashier looked back at my driver’s license again and got a seriously uncomfortable look on her face.

When we got outside, I said to [Girl]”

Me: “Here, listen. Why don’t we say I’m your big brother when we’re out in public?”

Girl: “But you’re a grown-up!”

Me: “Well… some kids do have big brothers or sisters who are grown-ups. The problem is that I’m twenty-one years old and you are eight, and that’s… well… Let’s say it’s going to have people wondering a lot of questions about me that I’d prefer they didn’t!”