A Very Cold Caller

(My father died unexpectedly last year, and I decided to re-register a website domain he used to own and turn it into a memorial page for him. I do all the HTML coding myself, buy hosting, and put the site online. The first thing you see is a big picture of him, with, “In memory of [Father],” in huge writing. This is very clearly all the site is for, and the design isn’t bad, even if I do say so myself. The very next day, from nine am onwards, I’m getting cold calls about SEO and web design services. Some variation of this conversation happens literally eight or ten times over the course of three hours:)

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name].”

Cold Caller: “Yes, am I speaking to [My Name mispronounced]?”

Me: “Yes, that’s me.”

Cold Caller: “I’m calling from [Company] about the domain you recently registered, [Domain mispronounced].com?”

Me: “Yes?”

Cold Caller: “We offer comprehensive web design, and Google search engine optimisation services. What sort of site were you looking to create for your business?”

Me: “Why don’t you go to the site now and maybe take a look?”

Cold Caller: “Yes, I’m looking at the site now.”

Me: “You are? You see the webpage in front of you now? And you’re still calling to try to sell me design and SEO? REALLY?”

Cold Caller: “Well, sir, our packages are very well-priced—”

Me: “Mate, look at the webpage. Read it out to me right now. What does it say?”

Cold Caller: “…”

Me: “Does it look like I need a web designer? Or SEO?”

Cold Caller: “I see. I’m sorry, sir—”

Me: *click*