A Suspension On That Detention

(This student has gotten a reminder notice for lunch detention and goes to protest in the principal’s office.)

Student: “This detention is totally wrong. I wasn’t really tardy yesterday.”

Principal: “[Teacher] said you were in the hall talking to your friends when the bell rang, so she marked you tardy.”

Student: “But I was right outside the door. She could see me so I shouldn’t have detention, right?”

Principal: “No, you have to be in class when the bell rings. Just go to lunch detention.”

(Student turns to walk out, mumbling under his breath.)

Principal: “What is that in your back pocket?”

Student: “Um…” *pulls out can of snuff* “…nothing?”

Principal: “Okay, forget about the lunch detention…”

Student: “Really?”

Principal: “…because you’re suspended for the rest of the week for bringing that on campus.”

Student: “That’s so not fair! How come everyone always picks on me?!”