A Stupid Side Of Society Has Been Unmasked, Part 6

Current Events, Health & Body, Jerk, Medical Office, Politics, Stupid, USA | Healthy | October 15, 2024

It’s the middle of the global health crisis. My mom, a seamstress, has made me a cloth mask that meets the criteria. Due to restrictions, my mom goes to her medical appointments alone. I have to be her chauffeur due to health reasons unrelated to said crisis.

Well, wouldn’t you know it, my soda has hit bottom, and I need to use the restroom. I don my mask and head in.

A lady and a large, burly security guard meet me at the door.

Lady: “Hey, sorry for the inconvenience, but we have to have everyone wear a disposable mask. You can put it on over the top of your current one if that makes it easier.”

Me: “Eh, whatever works.”

I put the mask on over my own, carefully aligning it so it fits perfectly with my mask. The lady looks almost ready to cry with relief.

Lady: “Wow! That’s a great attitude to have!”

I’m a bit surprised by the relief, but I shrug.

Me: “Well, I can argue and waste your time and mine, or I can just put the darn thing on and go about my business right away.”

The security man is smiling behind his mask, if the crinkling around his eyes is any indication. I lift my bangs out of the way and let him check my temperature. I’m then given the go-ahead.

I all but sprint to the bathroom, and I leave after my business and hygiene routine is finished. I come out to the sound of yelling at the front door.

Man: “At least he’s been in contact and offering support instead of sitting around golfing like Obama did while Katrina victims suffered and 9/11 happened! [President] says masks don’t work, so I’m not wearing one!”

Mini History Reminder: 9/11 happened in 2001. Hurricane Katrina happened in August of 2005. Obama wasn’t sworn in as President until January of 2009.

The security guard is clearly trying not to lose IQ points at this idiotic argument.

Security Guard: “Then you’re not going in. If you miss your appointment because you won’t wear your mask, that’s your fault.”

Man: “F****** Obama supporter!”

I wait for the chaos to settle as the man storms off.

I slowly approach the exit and check to make sure the nutbag has left. Then, I turn to look at the lady and the security guard, both of whom look like they’re trying to stave off headaches.

Me: “So, um, I guess I know why you were so relieved when I just put the second mask on.”

I point to my face, where both masks are still securely in place.

Security Guard: “It’s been three months of this…”

Me: *Sympathetic* “I’m so sorry! Hang in there.”

It sounded pretty dang pathetic in retrospect, considering the months that followed. I got to hear similar conversations a lot.