A Pre-Holiday Basket Case

(I work for a call center handling issues typical AFTER something has already gone wrong. I take a call on the Thursday before Easter Sunday.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [Company]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I need help finding an Easter basket for my nieces. I am not sure what to get them. I have never bought one before.”

Me: “Well, I can try and help with that? Do you know what your nieces like?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Well, do you know their favorite color?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Do you know what kind of candy they like?”

Customer: “No. Look I just need help picking out a basket.”

Me: “I’ll be honest. We are a major online seller. Since it’s so close to Easter, sir, there are hundred of baskets for sale on the website.”

Customer: *long pause* “Well… I know they like girly stuff… How about something with crafts?”

Me: “Sir, I looked and there are still several baskets with that type of stuff. Do you have anything else to help narrow down the search?”

Customer: “Just pick some out for me and I will look.”

(I spend the next 45 minutes adding over 20 different baskets to his cart/basket online and he says no to all.)

Customer: “We are getting nowhere with this. Every basket I want won’t make it in time. Why?”

Me: “Sir, the ones you picked out are sold by third-party sellers. It looks like each one is made to order when you order it.”

Customer: “Why don’t you make them ship faster? You should make them ship faster.”

Me: “Sir, I can’t make them ship faster. It’s their choice if they want to ship that fast.”

Customer: “You are no help. Screw it. I am going to Wal-Mart!” *click*

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