A Mountain Of Expectation

I work in a very large and very wild national park in the northern USA. I work near a visitor’s center close to a collection of tourist hotspots.

Guest: “So, how does this work? Is there like, a tour?”

Me: “We don’t provide guided tours, but we have lots of trail maps and recommended paths for all types of accessibility.”

Guest: “Oh… So, I need to walk?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

Guest: “I can’t just like… have it all come to me?”

Me: “Are you literally asking for the mountain to come to you?”

Guest: “…”

Me: “No, ma’am, you need to walk.”

Guest: “Oh, then this isn’t for me.”

She returned to her car and drove off. Total visit time: five minutes.