A Marriage That Makes You Need Wine

, , , , , , | Right | April 4, 2019

(My husband is the bad customer in this story. While at a grocery store, we’re checking out, and I’m paying using an app on my phone. I have a bottle of wine.)

Cashier: “Can I have your ID, please?”

Me: “Sure. Oh, you know what? I didn’t even bring my wallet; I’m so used to paying via the app. Don’t worry about the wine.”

Husband: “Here, I’ll buy it.”

Me: “You can’t; it’s against the law. We both have to have an ID.”

Cashier: “Thank you, ma’am. She’s right, sir.”

Husband: “I’m not buying it for you; I’m buying it for me.”

Cashier: “Um…”

Me: “She can’t sell it to you. It’s against the law.”

Husband: “Okay, so, what if I just go to another checkout lane and buy it. No harm done, right?”

Cashier: *visibly winces*

Me: “Well, there is, now that you’ve told her that’s your plan. If she lets you do that, she can be in big trouble.”

Husband: “WHY CAN’T I JUST BUY YOU YOUR WINE?”

Me: “Please go wait over there.”

Cashier: “I am so sorry, ma’am.”

Me: “Sorry for what? That I married a guy who doesn’t listen? You have a great day.”

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