A Long Time Ago, In A Final Frontier Far Far Away…

(I work at a single-screen independent theatre. One day right after Christmas, the phone rings:)

Customer: “I see you’re playing [Critical Favourite Film without a lot of popular interest]. Do you have it on for long?”

Me: “We’re just screening it this week, on [dates].”

Customer: “It’s one of the best films of the year; why aren’t you playing it more?”

Me: “There are many fantastic films and sometimes we have to make tough choices.”

Customer: “Well, is anyone else playing it?”

Me: “I’m not sure if anyone else will be playing it.”

Customer: “I’m out of town this week and no one is playing this movie!”

Me: “I’m sorry you’re away, but we are playing [Film].”

Customer: “You just play Star Trek!”

Me: “We’re not playing Star Trek.”

Customer: “Everyone is playing Star Trek for a month straight!”

Me: “Yes, the big theatres are playing Star Wars, but not us.”

(Sorry we didn’t check your schedule before we booked that movie?)