A Library With A Likely Story

(I find a wallet with the owner’s ID from middle school.)

Me: *over the all-call speakers* “[Name], please come up to the front desk for your missing wallet. [Name], please come up to the front desk.”

(An adult comes up to the front desk.)

Adult: “Hi, I’m [Name].”

Me: “I’m sorry, but according to this ID, she’s still in middle school.”

Adult: “Oh, I’m, um, her sister.”

Me: “With the same name?”

Adult: “Yeah, my mom was a little weird. Can I have her wallet now?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’d like to see your sister and put this is in her possession.”

Adult: ”What?! What do you think I’m going to do, steal my sister’s money or something? Just give me the d*** wallet!”

(A girl comes over.)

Girl: “Hi, I’m [Name].”

Adult: “Sis! Where were you? It’s been ten minutes. I tried to get the wallet to you to save time, but this stupid woman thinks I’m not your sister!”

Girl: “Who are you?”

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