A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 13
Our management team gives us raises and bonuses, so that’s great, but they do ALSO give us the occasional pizza party. Since said pizza parties are not replacements for raises and bonuses, we all enjoy them, apart from one guy.
This one coworker scans the nine pizzas my manager brought into the office and says:
Coworker: “Why is there only one vegan pizza?”
Manager: “Well, you’re the only vegan.”
Coworker: “Yes, but why is there only one vegan pizza? Everyone else in the office gets multiple pizza options, and I only get one?”
Manager: “Actually, this pizza is half one flavor, half another, so you still get two options.”
Coworker: “No. To keep it fair, half the pizzas need to be vegan. Anything less is discrimination.”
Manager: “There are thirty people here, and you’re the only vegan, but half the pizzas need to be vegan?”
Coworker: “Anything less is discrimination. I’ll go to HR if this happens again.”
The following Monday, there was a memo sent around to the whole office that pizza parties were cancelled for the foreseeable future due to “accommodation technicalities”. Everyone knew what that meant, and everyone was majorly p***ed at the vegan coworker.
My other coworker (a friend) was so angry that he decided he was going to throw his own pizza party, paid for by himself, so he didn’t have to cater to any office rules. That Friday, he brought in ten pizzas, half meat, half vegetarian, but all made with real cheese.
The vegan coworker came by and saw all the pizzas and everyone enjoying them. He grabbed a plate and started to hover around the options. As soon as he realized that there was nothing for him, he went to the manager to complain.
Manager: “[Friend] did this on his own for his own reasons. It has nothing to do with the company, and there’s nothing I can do.”
For a few months after that, every coworker who had a special event (mostly birthdays) celebrated with a pizza party in the office. Never was a vegan pizza ever ordered. Every time this happened, the vegan coworker looked angrier than a mosquito in a mannequin factory.
Related:
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 12
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 11
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 10
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 9
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 8
