A Healthy Amount Of Unhealthy Food

| Friendly | April 8, 2017

(I live with my landlady, who is a teacher, and her son. Her daughter lives with her dad, but she comes around often to hang out with her brother. Both my landlady and her daughter work at the same grocery store for the summer. One day, the daughter comes home and is bringing in groceries. But I and her brother are a little confused…)

Me: “What is all this?”

Daughter: “Stuff my mom bought.”

(Her mother will sometimes go in early and buy groceries and put them in her daughter’s car right before her daughter gets off work to take home. She’s done this a few times before so her daughter wasn’t shocked to see the food in her car. My roommate comes up to help his sister with the groceries.)

Son: “Uh… sis, you sure mom bought this stuff?”

Daughter: “Yeah, why else would it be in my car?”

Me: “[Daughter], we’re questioning it because this isn’t stuff your mom usually buys.”

(Their mom is a real health nut. Fresh foods only; no sugar or junk food or artificial stuff. The supposed groceries include soda, sugary juices, frozen pizza, fruit snacks, candy, chips, toilet paper, and tissues. Also the items are all generic brands; she only buys name brand.)

Son: “Yeah, this isn’t stuff mom would ever buy.”

Me: “Maybe she bought it for school?”

(She will sometimes buy treats for her students as a reward.)

Son: “But the school year doesn’t start for another month. And if so, why the pizza and toilet paper?”

Daughter: “I’ll ask her. In the meantime let’s just get it all out of my car.”

(She texts her mom and we just leave most of it in the dining room. We get a response two hours later…)

Daughter: “So… my mom said she didn’t buy that stuff.”

Me: “Then where did you get it?”

Daughter: “I swear, it was just in my car when I got there.”

Son: “So… does that mean we can eat it all?”

(Being the young, irresponsible people we are, we starting eating the fruit snacks.)

Daughter: “Mom said we shouldn’t eat it.”

Us: “It’s a little late for that…”

(Their mom was very worried that the manager was gonna accuse them of stealing since they technically didn’t pay for it. The manager said to not worry about it and told her to just keep it since it was already paid for (they checked inventory and saw no losses) and he’d keep an eye out for anyone who lost their groceries. As far as I know, they never found the person who misplaced their groceries in the wrong car.)

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