A Hateful Eight

(Our store closes at different times each day, so some customers are confused about closing times. Two ladies enter together just before closing time and start browsing the shelves.)

Customer #1: “Hey, why did the lights go out?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s 7:58, and we close at 8:00. Do you need help finding anything?”

Customer #1: “What do you mean you close at 8:00? I thought you closed at 10:00?”

Me: “Our hours are very confusing, I agree. We close at 10:00 on Fridays and Saturdays, but at 8:00 on Mondays through Wednesdays.”

(My coworker comes with keys to lock the front door, and I switch off our open sign. It is now 8:01.)

Customer #2: “What is she doing? Is she locking us in here?”

Coworker: “No, I’ll let you out when you’re finished, but we have to close the doors since it’s now after 8:00 pm. I’ll wait right here so you can get out.”

Customer #2: “But I thought y’all closed at 10:00?”

Me: “Again, I know it’s confusing. We close at 8:00 tonight. Is there anything I can help you find? We really need to finish closing up for the night.”

Customer #1: “Absolutely not! You’re kicking us out!”

Me: “No, miss, I’m not. You were here before we closed. If you know what you’d like, I’d be happy to ring it up for you.”

Customer #2: “This is so rude. I cannot believe this.”

Customer #1: “We are paying customers like anyone else; how dare you kick us out?!”

Coworker: “She wasn’t kicking you out, but now that it’s 8:10 and you’re still squabbling about it, I’m going to have to kick you out.”

Customer #2: “How dare you?! I’m writing a letter to the manager! No, to the state! You’re both getting fired! This store closes at 10:00!”

(The customers left together, without purchasing anything. Once outside they went to take a photo of our posted hours, at which point they noticed that the sign clearly says we close at 8:00 pm on Monday.)