A Different Kind Of Anti-Vax Rant

, , | Right | CREDIT: AdoptsDEATHsCats | September 23, 2020

I’ll start by saying anyone has been around as long as I have will recognize this is an old story because the VAX was one of the big mainframe computers, not one that took an entire room, but a good portion of one. Relevant to the story is the fact that the software for these computers was put on reel to reel tapes that were shipped to the customers.

I work for a company that manufactures software for these computers and it is quite easy for a bug in the software to cause the computers to crash. I take a support call:

Caller: “Your software crashed our system!”

This is how the caller announces himself, so immediately I do the apologetic that’s so awful and I’m so sorry, etc.

Me: “Could you tell me where you loaded the software?”

Caller: “I walked into the computer room and set it on top of the computer and the whole system went down.”

Me: “I beg your pardon?”

Caller: “I sent the tape reel on top of the computer and it crashed! You crashed my VAX!”

Me: “Could I have you hold just a moment please, sir?”

I mute my headset and start laughing. My coworker next to me notices.

Coworker: “What’s happening?”

Me: “Apparently we crashed this guy’s computer by osmosis.”

Coworker: “How?!”

Me: “We apparently are that powerful. Merely touching our software to the outside of the system caused the entire system to die.”

I return to the customer and give him instructions on how to send us his crash log of what was happening when the system went down. Spoiler alert: Our software was not the cause of the problem.

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