A Culture Shock

(We’re halfway through a chemistry lab session, when a student comes over to ask us for help. Earlier he had been complaining that his poor grade in the lecture was due to the fact that our lecture teacher is of Middle Eastern descent and ‘can’t speak English.’)

Student: *after my lab partner and I have shown him what he was doing wrong* “Oh, wow, thanks! If I’d known you were this good I’d have asked for help earlier. I just thought all you cultural people couldn’t speak English.”

(I have had a terrible day already. I decide to mess with him.)

Me: “I don’t get what you mean.”

Student: “You know, cultural.”

Me: “No, I don’t get it.” *points at half white partner* “He has culture. You have culture. We all have culture. What DO you mean?”

Student: “Well, I mean… You know. Like…”

Me: “You mean, not white.”

Student: “Well, um, yeah.”

Me: “I thought people like you only lived under bridges.”

(My lab partner doubles over laughing.)

Student: “What? I don’t get it!”

My Lab Partner: *in between chortles* “It’s, heh, because you’re a TROLL. Get it?”

(He just walked away from us mumbling about cultural people. It was pretty funny.)