A Big Fat Apology

(I’m 8 months pregnant with our first baby. It has not been an easy pregnancy. My husband has been entirely sympathetic to my ailments. I’m trying to stretch out my legs, which has been getting more difficult as I get bigger.)

Me: *whining* “My belly is in the way, d*** it!”

Husband: “Aw, I’m sorry.”

Me: *grumpily* “Well, you should be. You put it there!”