A Big Baby Booboo

| Related | May 20, 2014

(My new girlfriend has come over to spend the weekend with me at my parents place. Note that I am also a girl, and while my parents have been accepting of our relationship they apparently don’t quite grasp the technicalities of it.)

Dad: “Oh, and [Girlfriend], you’ll need to help me make up the sofa for you once dinner is over. I trust you understand that what you and [My Name] get up to at your place is your business, but I don’t want any… well… ‘accidents’ happening under my roof.”

(A moment of silence passes while my father goes back to eating his dinner, oblivious to what he’s just implied.)

Girlfriend: “Um, sir, you do know girls can’t get each other pregnant, right? Not without a man being involved in there somehow.”

(My dad promptly looks at her like this a major revelation, leaving me to have to stifle a sudden onset of giggles.)

Me: “Dad… you didn’t actually think—”

Dad: “Hey, they didn’t cover things like this when I went to school, okay?! Give me a break!”

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