Turning Your Nose Up At The Experience

(My freshman year of high school I sat with a group of my friends during lunch. These friends, unlike me, were generally pretty rambunctious, but today, one of them took things to a whole new level.)

Me: “[Friend], what are you doing?”

Friend: “Crushing up some Cool Ranch Doritos.”

Me: “What? Why?”

Friend: “I’m gonna snort ’em.”

Me: “Hang on, what?”

Friend: “I’m gonna snort ’em!”

Me: “I very, very strongly advise against this course of action.”

Friend: “Nah, it’ll be fine.”

Me: “Your funeral.”

(My friend snorted the Doritos, and instantly regretted it when the spices hit. The kicker? Fifteen minutes and a fair amount of tears later, he began crushing up more Doritos for Round Two! Needless to say, I don’t sit with him anymore.)