Thought He Was Screwing You Over

(As I live in a busy city, albeit in a nice area, I am a little protective of my bike. I bring it into my apartment at night and never leave it tied up outside for long. As a joke my dad recently attached a particularly ugly children’s cartoon horn to the bike and finding it amusing I haven’t bothered taking it off. One day I park my bike in bad spot at the mall and come out to see a man bent over it. Obviously, I assume he is trying to damage it or steal it so I walk around to stand in front of him.)

Me: “Excuse me. Can my bike and I help you?”

(He looks up at me horrified and I realize he has a screwdriver in his hand with the horn dangling from a screw.)

Me: “Are you seriously stealing my bike horn?”

(He then drops the screwdriver and runs away.)

Me: “Wait, it’s ugly; you can have it! Oh, well, too late. Hey, free screwdriver!”

(Needless to say, I am even more cautious about my bike in the city now. I dropped the horn in a donation bin a few days later, though. It was nice of him to take it off. And I still have his screwdriver.)