Unfiltered Story #91959

“This is outrageous! UPS never called me to confirm anything! This is highway robbery and I *will* report you to the Better Business Bureau!”

“UPS never called you? At all? They said they called you at least twice.”

“Well, I mean, I had two missed calls on my cell phone that I didn’t answer because I didn’t recognize the number, would that be from UPS?”

The sound you hear is me loading my non-existent .44 snub-nose