Said Without Batting An Eye

(I work in an office with mostly smart people – first or second upper class honours graduates. One day, one of my contact lens comes off and I am wandering around asking for saline so that I can replace my lens.)

Me: *calling out loudly* “Anyone have saline? Contact lens solution?”

Colleague: “Me!”

Me: “Thanks. How long ago did you open it?”

Colleague: “I can’t remember. Sometime last year? It’s a large bottle, and can be used for a long time.”

Me: “[Colleague], the fine print on the bottle says that it should be discarded 30 days after opening!”

Colleague: “Oh, is that why my eyes keep getting infected?”