No Pain, No Brain

Coworker: “Hey, I’m bored.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s really slow today.”

(My coworker wanders around for a bit before returning with a stapler.)

Coworker: “Wanna see something awesome?”

Me: “Like what?”

Coworker: “I can put a staple in my hand, and it won’t even hurt!”

(At this point I am wondering a little bit if he might be high or something, since he is saying this with complete sincerity.)

Me: “Please don’t, you could really—”

(He flips open the stapler as I am saying this, and jabs himself right in the middle of his hand.)

Me: “—hurt yourself.”

(He stares at his hand for about ten seconds before letting out an ear-splitting scream.)

Coworker: “OWWW! Why is it bleeding?! Why is it hurting?!”

Me: “Um, because you just stabbed yourself with a stapler?”

Coworker: “But stapling yourself shouldn’t hurt! Why does my hand hurt?!”