Unfiltered Story #47666

(We adopted a new puppy who is having trouble potty training. I am reading a book while the puppy is happily chewing on a toy. Mom comes home from work.)

Mom: So, did the puppy have any accidents?

Me: Only one, if you can believe it.

Mom: Did you clean it up?

(I don’t think she’s serious, so I look up to make sure. She is serious.)

Me: …*returns to book* No, I decided to let it stink up the house.

Mom: What?! Why would you-*pauses*

Me: *grins*

Mom: …smarta**!

Me: Love you too!

Puppy: *pees*

Mom and Me: F***!