Unfiltered Story #364653

(It’s very late one night. The show that I was going to watch was cancelled, so I go upstairs to my parent’s room. My dad is awake, my mom is asleep, and two of our cats are sleeping on the bed with her.)
Dad: I thought you were going to watch [Show]?
Me: *Explains the issue* So now I get to go to sleep early, which is nice.
Mom: *sitting up, eyes closed* Good morning!
Dad: [Mom], it’s not morning.
Mom: It’s not?
Dad: No, honey.
Mom: Oh… Then why is there a party?
(My dad and I look at each other, realizing that she was not awake.)
Dad: There’s no party. It’s just me, [My Name], [Cat #1], and [Cat #2].
Mom: Oh, my kittens! My kittens are here and they love their mommy!
Dad: [My Name], why don’t you take [Cat #1]? He’s just gonna run away when I get in bed, and he’ll sleep in your room anyway.
Mom: NOOOOO! DON’T TAKE MY KITTENS! THEY LOVE THEIR MOMMY!
Dad: Honey, the kittens will leave when I get in bed anyway. They’re sleeping in my spot.
Mom: Oh… Ok.
Me: *picking up my cat and walking out of the room* Night, Dad. Night, Mom.
Mom: *muffled, because she has now covered her face with a pillow* Peace, man.
(My dad and I burst out into the laughter we have been holding back this whole conversation, and I leave the room. As I get ready for bed I can hear muffled voices. It sounds like my dad is trying to convince my mom not to press a pillow down on her own face while she sleeps, for obvious reasons.)