Unfiltered Story #363835

(I work with the most indifferent coworker ever, to the point even the boss shouting at him doesnt phase him. One morning he comes in half hour late)

Boss: *coworker*! WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?

Coworker: *monotone* Got a puncture

Boss: Ok, just call to say youre running late next time

Me: *after the boss has left* Dont you catch the train to work?

Coworker: *shrugs, still monotone* Yeah but he doesnt need to know that