35 Cents Too Rich For That Wallet
(I work at the student mail center on a university campus, and we constantly have 18-year-old freshmen come in who have never mailed a letter in their lives, and have no idea how it works.)
Customer: “Hi! So, I’ve never done this before, but I have to mail a thing.”
Me: “Okay. What is it you have to mail?”
Customer: “Just a thing. How much is it?”
Me: “Well, I have to see what you’re mailing. Do you have it with you?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Go ahead and take it out for me.”
Customer: *takes a wallet out of her backpack* “Just this.” *puts it back in her backpack*
Me: “Okay, well I need you to take it back out so I can weigh it. Does this have to get anywhere fast?”
Customer: *has not taken the wallet back out yet* “I don’t know. How long does it take?”
Me: “Depends on where it’s going.”
Customer: “I’m sending it to my brother.”
Me: “Okay, where?”
Customer: “To my brother’s house, duh.”
Me: “Yes, but where is your brother’s house?”
Customer: “Oh, in [Town about an hour from here].”
Me: “Okay, then in that case, if you put it in this envelope, it’ll get there in about three days. Is that okay?”
Customer: “Sure, whatever.”
Me: “So just write your address here, and your brother’s address in the middle, and when you’re done, it’ll be about $3 all together.”
Customer: “…Why?”
Me: “What do you mean?”
Customer: “My friend said it would only cost like thirty-five cents to mail something.”
Me: “Um, that’s not really how it works. It’s based on weight and—”
Customer: “But my friend said it would only be like thirty-five cents!”
Me: “Look, even if all you were mailing was a postcard, that would be thirty-seven cents. If you were mailing a single sheet of paper, it would be forty-nine cents. But you’re mailing a wallet. Even at the cheapest shipping, you’d be looking at about two and a half dollars for postage, and fifty cents for the envelope.”
Customer: *rolls her eyes* “Whatever. I have to ask my mom if I’m allowed to spend more than thirty-five cents on this.”
(Then she walked off and we never saw her again.)
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