Unfiltered Story #342594

(My father, while in his mid-60s, is an energetic man, avid biker, and ever talking about his pet projects. He retires this year. I’m moving after Christmas, and my mother is retired as well. My father is well-meaning, but puts the cart before the horse a lot.)
Mom: So we’ll work on the garden this year…
Me: What about the deck?
Mom: He’s not getting far this year, he retires in fall.
Me: Like that will stop him.
Mom: It better.
Me: You’ve been married almost 50 years. You know better. Hide his tools, or something.
Mom: Any advice where to hide the saw tables?
Me: My bedroom?
Mom: We’re redoing that too.
Me: Sucks to be you.
(Needless to say, my sympathy is limited. Also, I’m moving to live with my partner, who wants to adopt every breathing creature. My hands are full.)