Unfiltered Story #32552

Unfiltered | November 24, 2016

We’ve been told there might be disruptions to our lessons today as the upper year media students are filming throughout the school (note: many of our classrooms are connected to each other via doors). We’ve just started our third period when one of said media students bursts into the room.

Student 1: THE GAYS ARE AFTER ME! THE GAYS ARE AFTER ME!

He runs straight through the room and to the door that leads to the adjacent room. It’s locked so he starts looking around madly in panic. Several seconds later a group of fluorescent teenages waltz into the room with a glitter cannon and let it off. The teacher looks beside himself as the glitter descends. One of our class members stands up.

Student 2: Stop this now! This is homophobic and offensive!

Student 3: Calm down! It’s just a bit of fun.

Student 2: I will not *air quotes* “CALM DOWN”. I’m gay and find this offensive, and I-

Student 3: Yeah, and so are we!

Student 2: – will be going to the headteacher about this. [Teacher], how can you condone this kind of discrimination?

Teacher: From what I can see, [Student 2], everyone in our mini pride parade here is a member of [school]’s LGBT group, so if they’re ok with it, so am I.

Student 3: I’m ok with it.

Student 4&5: Me too.

Student 1: Same here.

Me: Me too…

The entire room looks at me as I realise what I’ve done (I’m not out at this point). Student 3 comes up to me.

Student 3: *hand outstretched* Do you trust me?

Me: … what?

Student 3: Do you TRUST me?

I suddenly realise she’s quoting Aladdin. I stare at my teacher expectantly.

Teacher: *shrugs* Anyone who wants to take part is free to leave, but they have to help with the cleanup after school and finish today’s lesson as homework.

Nearly all the class agree to take part. Student 2 sits down with a face so red it could be used as a traffic light signal.

Teacher: [Student 1], catch. *throws key*

Student 1: *escaping through the door* FREEDOM!

Student 3: GAYS UNITE!

We then spent the rest of the day chasing after various upper years, coating them in glitter and fluorescent paint. Best day ever!