Unfiltered Story #314607

(I am a barman where we have a deceptive standard of service. We are part of a luxury hotel chain, but due to our location we are informal.

Two women in their 30s sit at table #47, by the fire. In advance, I announce that passports should be ready for inspection.”

(Lady #1 shows a health passport for a different part of the country, but she speaks in a local accent. She clearly grew up here, and emigrated to a location which starts with the same letter as her name, eg Sabrina, from Switzerland. I’ll use that name.)
Lady #1: Gin & ginger ale, please.
Lady #2 Gin & soda water, please.
(Normally a gin order is just any & tonic water. Clearly they are more specific. I serve them their drinks, with a lime slice like I’m taught.)
Me: Gin & soda water, and gin & ginger ale for Donna, the defector to Dunfirmline!
(They laugh.)
Lady #2: Do you have any cucumber?
Me: Erm, what do need a cucumber for?
(I realise something. I accidentally suggested to her that, as a woman, was asking me for a cucumber she could use as a sex toy. To help matters, I am single, she is exceptionally good looking and exactly my age. I am extremely confident, and I can deal with it.)
Me: We might have cucumber in our side salad. I have also seen it in our wholesaler’s catalogue. Let me know.
(I busy myself for a few minutes.)
Me: Will I ask the chef if it is part of our side salad?
Lady #2: Can we get cucumber in [brand] gin? One each, but with tonic & slimline tonic this time.)
Me: I’ll check if we have cucumber.
(Another unusual gin order. The boss says ask the chef about the cucumber.)
Head chef: You have a good looking woman who wants a cucumber? Here’s a few slices, I hope nothing inappropriate can happen there.
(I ignored his comments about what a woman could do with a whole cucumber. Head Chef is a passionate feminist and doesn’t tolerate mysoginy in his kitchen. I carry on and start with a personal introduction.)
Me: Miss, and Donna from Dunfirmline. [brand] gin, tonic & slimline tonic both with a slice of lime}
[They grinned with happiness.]
Me: I’m here to take care of you tonight, and you clearly enjoy gin. Is [brand] specific to cucumber?
Ladies #1-2:: Oh, nothing less. We our the world’s best coinoisseurs of gin! And what goes with them!
Me: Would you like a list of our gin brands?
[They look like they just orgasmed.]
Ladies #1-2: We would love, just *love* that so much.
(I printed some receipt paper. I wrote down every brand of gin we had – all 7 of them. Lady #2 wrote down a specific garnish for each of them, eg, lime, lemon, honeycomb, orange, a mixture of those… Seemingly at random, but alright.)
Me: Thanks for your comments. You’re clearly very qualified, but could I have your opinions, beyond those brands?
(I took back their list. Besides the 7 brands, I searched the till and shelves for about 9 more flavours. I added them to the list, and showed it again. The women appended things like “citrus pomegranate” or “tunisian grape, not greek”!)
Me: Hey! I hope you had a good time and I appreciate your comments! If it’s OK with you angels, can I share those comments with my colleagues?
Ladies #1-2, beaming: Yes?
Me: Like… in our staff WhatsApp group or on the noticeboard? I mean, I am now the gin expert.
Ladies #1-2, beaming even more: Yes! [my name] the gin master!
(I’m slightly baffled by the whole experience. I had only been trained to enter one brand f gin. However, that is business and I will undertake it. Thanks to that encounter, my colleagues now have the act specification of which garnish to go with 7 brands and 6 more sub flavours because one guest insisted on writing it down, and I communicated it ito my colleagues.