Unfiltered Story #28052

(I’m friends with a married couple who I call on the phone a lot. I’m a big fan of “Gravity Falls” while they just know of it but they tolerate me talking about it. This time we’re discussing what I know of the finale.)

Me: So Bill the dream demon has turned Gravity Falls into chaos incarnate. Say; is it racist to say “When we run out of supplies, we’ll eat the gnomes.”

(The wife tells me no and we go through several characters before she stops me.)

Wife: I’m sorry. Did you say that guy married a stone woodpecker?

Me: Yes. Well, he married the woodpecker and then she got turned to stone and stuck on his arm.

Wife: He married a woodpecker?!

Me: Yeah. It’s legal in Gravity Falls.

Wife: That is so weird.

(I start laughing.)

Me: A dream demon is creating chaos incarnate and you’re stuck on the guy married to a woodpecker?

Wife: Yeah.

Husband: Well, a dream demon causing chaos is doing what it’s supposed to do. It’s unnatural to marry a woodpecker.

Me: This is going on notalways.