Unfiltered Story #27904

Unfiltered | November 2, 2015

(My mom and sister have recently moved into a new home and quickly discovered a groundhog burrow in the backyard. Because the hole is in an inconvenient location where someone can step in it and break their leg and they’re worried about accidentally running over him with a riding mower, they decide that they need to remove and relocate him to ensure his safety and then fill in the hole. They’re discussing how they can go about doing this while in line at the grocery store.)

Sister: Maybe if we set a trap up for him, we can move him to a field somewhere?

Mom: That’s an option.

Sister: Or maybe…

Stranger In Line: You can always do what I did and just throw some broken glass at the hole’s entrance.

Sister: …what?

Stranger In Line: You know, throw broken glass at the entrance! And make sure you get some inside the hole! Then when they run out, they cut themselves up and just bleed out on the grass.

Mom: Um…we don’t want to hurt the groundhog.

Stranger: It’ll only hurt him for a second! You won’t even have to remove the body, just let it rot where it drops. It’s perfectly natural!

(They could not get out of there fast enough. They ended up hiring a professional to trap and relocate it somewhere safe. Why someone thinks killing animals with broken glass is something a sane person would do is beyond me.)