Unfiltered Story #27875

(My friends and I tend to be…eccentric. One night, Friend 1 says my name while trying to address Friend 2.)

Friend 1: Hey, Kevin. Wanna play Pathfinder?

Friend 2: Sure.

Me: *yelling from my bedroom* HEY, FRIEND! I’M KEVIN, AND SURE.

Friend 3: Hahaha! “I’m Kevin!”

Friend 1: I’M KEVIN! No. Now he’s Kevin, too. I’m Kevin, too. She’s Kevin, too. We’re all Kevin!

Me: Mwuahahah! I’m spreading…you will all be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

Friend 1: Hey, Kevin. Kevin’s giving me weird looks again.

Me: Yeah. What’s up with that Kevin?

Friend 3: What?

(This continues for a bit, until…)

Friend 1: Everyone’s Kevin! It’s like a disease!

Friend 3: Kevin grew.

Friend 1: Hehe. Kevin’s a growth.

Me: Technically, true. Kevin did grow. All Kevins grew.

Friend 1: Did you know that most Kevins breathe air?

Me: Wrong. Most Kevins breath Kevins.

Friend 1: Is everything turning into Kevin?

Me: Kevin is indeed Kevin into Kevin. (Everything is indeed turning into Kevin.)

Friend 1: Kevin Kevin is Kevin Kevin.

(And so it begins…)