26 Marvelously Merry Christmas Stories About Unseasonably Grinchy Customers
Dear readers,
It may be Christmas Day, but that doesn’t mean we’re taking a break from bringing you yet more crazy tales of customers over the holiday season. We hope wherever you are, you’re able to get some joy out of today, even if you’re working!
We’ve rounded up twenty-six stories about Christmas, customers, and the mess that can happen when you mix them up!
Oh, How The Truth Doth Sting – Oh, snap!
Please Call Customer Dis-service – What?! You’re leaving? Please, come back! We’re nothing without you!
Sweet (Tea) Out Of (Pot) Luck – Sounds like it’s time to lock the doors.
Even Santa Has To Read His List (And Check It Twice) – What do you think your signature means?!
Why The Pope And Dalai Lama Are Unlisted – This was an “emergency”?
Twice The Prongs, Half The Brains – A tiny, cheery-colored lightbulb moment!
Sorry, Jesus, Your Birthday’s Been Moved Up – Didn’t anyone learn from that Fairly Oddparents special that wishing for Christmas every day is bad?!
The Sweet, Slightly Nutty Taste Of Surrender – We can’t help, either.
A Nasty Case Of Selective Illiteracyosis – Hits from the comments: “I don’t think there’s enough aloe vera in the world that can help that burn.”
Stupidity Exemplified – To be fair, does anyone really want a 2000 Focus?
Santa Goes Psycho – We were confused as heck, too. Luckily, our clever commenters have the answer!
The Joy Of Cooking Without Opposable Thumbs – Just get the dog a nice steak and call it a day.
Gestapo, Taco, Same Difference – …what?
Introducing The Xbox Air – Hits from the comments: “Never, ever underestimate how quickly a client will throw dignity out of the window.”
Jingle H*lls – New band name idea: The D*** Baby Jesuses.
Slippery Christmas Ice – At least there was a simple solution to this conundrum.
A Question With No Good Manswers – You don’t know your size, but you expect a stranger to?
Barely Scratched The Surface – Hits from the comments: “I hear the customer then went to the auto shop and asked if they sell any elbow grease.”
The Trim Reaper – You really don’t know how plants work, do you?
Replacing One Clause With Another – We hope “from Santa” isn’t code for “stolen”.
Tis The Pre-Season – And to think, the rest of us complain about them putting out Christmas stuff too early.
What’s In A Name – I’m pretty sure I learned what “evergreen” meant in elementary school.
Cheapskating Around The Issue – If the cheap shoe fits…
A Little Cuckoo – How do you plan to make the birds wear them? We’re so curious!
Alarm Bells Will Be Ringing – Hits from the comments: “Well, if your Christmas is already ruined, I doubt a shoplifting prosecution will make it any worse.”
The Grinch Who Shocked Christmas – Sounds like someone needs to retire.
We hope you enjoyed this Christmas-themed roundup! Want to send in your own story? Submit your story here!
Some other roundups to check out if you liked this one:
23 Great Stories About Junk Food, And Why It’s Okay To Indulge Once In A While!
Question of the Week
Tell us about the worst boss/manager you’ve ever had!
