Unfiltered Story #245273

(I’d had a pretty nasty past involving men who used me or abused me. But this was a horse of different color. The year was 2009. I had just gotten skype and was spreading the word to entice the people I knew to add me so we could talk. One night, a person I don’t recognize adds me to their contacts.)

Me: Hello, who is this?

Him: I’m [username] I’m from [acquaintance’s chat]. Nice to meet you.

(Now, the acquaintance was someone I only knew from a distance, we’d never been close so I was a bit wary of this guy. Something about him made me uncomfortable.)

Him: So, [acquaintance] says you’re a fan of [law game]?

Me: Yeah, I think it’s pretty cool.

Him: That’s cool, personally I like [raunchy adult acts that have nothing to do with anything we’ve said to this point.]

Me: oh, um. Okay. Could we not discuss that, please?

(he devolves into a full blown rant that more oft than not includes phrases as “women are only sexy getting out of the shower.” and “Women are useless save for in bed.” I can tell he’s trying to rile me, that sad thing is, it’s working. He does this consistently for 3 hours, not even paying attention to my discomfort. I was naive, I had been told he was not a bad guy. Maybe I just had to tough it out?)

Me: Please, I don’t know anything about you that makes me comfortable with this situation. Since you refuse to stop. I’m going to bed.

Him: oh, okay. G’night sexy.

(I wish I could say it stopped there. This was just the first interaction of four between me and him. The next night devolved into him degrading our acquaintance’s Girlfriend to the point of objectifying her and making her out to be a slut. I was closer friends with her than acquaintance so I new this guy was talking out his aft end. The third night was even worse. He spoke mainly of his own ex and how horrible she was. Nothing, however, prepared me for his final assault.)

Him: Y’know, with us speaking as much as we have, I feel the need to ask you something.

Me: may I take a guess? (this was a mistake, I know.)

Him: sure!

Me: you want me to be your girlfriend.

Him: Wow, you are smart!

(I took the time to consider my response, it was an obvious “no” but, being naive and stupid I wanted to let him down gently.)

Me: I’m sorry, but I just don’t think it’d be a good idea. I don’t think I’d be a good match.

(no response. I logged off before he could. I felt ill… I’d feel worse the next day)

Him: I’m going to kill myself.
(I should’ve ignored it. I was such a fool.)

Me: Why?

Him: Because you won’t be my girlfriend!

Me: I told you, were not a good match, why would you want to kill yourself over that?

(he began rambling. out of sheer panic I checked online and Thanked every God I knew of that our acquaintance was online. I reached out in a full blown panic. the response was that they’d take care of it. To my horror, some responses included phrases like, “Not again!” or “Here we go….” He’d done this before. Our acquaintance contacted me in private.)

Me: WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM!?

Acq: He’s a bit troubled. He’s scared of dying alone, you see.

Me: He’s been practically assaulting me since we met! you expect me to just take it!? (I even copied over some of the nastier things he’d said.)

Acq: I’m sorry he put you through that. The only advice I can give you is to block him and ignore him.

(I did. on all fronts. For all intents and purposes, he and I had never met. I moved on. Slowly healing. Until a full year later. I’d made a few friends down the line. One day, someone I barely knew contacted me, he was known as AA)

AA: Hey there!

Me: hey.

AA: I wanted to apologize.

Me: ??? What for?

(so naive.)

AA: for saying all those things to you. It’s like [acq] said, I was desperate.

Me: !!! you!!!

AA: Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

(… this is something I knew I couldn’t do…. Ever…)

Me: No! Do you realize what you did?! You hurt me, you brutally ostracized me and made me feel like an object for your sexual deprivation! you hurt me!

AA: Fine. Always knew a stupid F****** C*** like you couldn’t take a joke.

Me: If your vulgar descriptions of sex and threatening to kill yourself over someone you’ve known for four days is meant to be a joke, I’m not laughing.

AA: Right, probably because you’re a R*****.

(I blocked him. Retaliation was swift as he reached out and got more than half the people I knew to block me and call me out. It was my word against his, and he was winning.

This story does have a happy ending though. For not long after, I found out he’d assaulted others. I began warning anyone who’d listen. Eventually I found myself a good chunk of friends I knew I could trust.

Note: This was the event that led to https://notalwaysright.com/game-of-life/19110/ It took me several long years and a lot of encouragement to finally heal, write this out, and upload it. Know that I’m now doing much better, and have gotten the help I needed. Thank you.)