Unfiltered Story #240416

(I am a deli clerk at a grocery store. The two cheapest meats we have are a ham and a turkey. I wouldn’t even say turkey. You look at the ingredients list and it says turkey breast, turkey broth, and one or two other things that I can’t remember. It is literally mush that they put into a mold. All the employees hate that we order it and hate handling it. It is slimy and squishy and gross, if you drop one while carrying it to the slicer it will bounce like a ball. We silently judge everyone who buys it.

Both thus ham and the “turkey” are normally$4.99 a pound. A few weeks ago they were on sale for $2.99. We keep them at the far end of the cold case that we serve our customers from, they are the red headed step children of our stock. The ham isn’t too bad, just really processed.

One day during this sale, I have a man approach that end of the case and I go to serve him. He is hee-hawing around and trying to decide how much of the cheap ham he wants.)

Man: “oh, maybe a pound. Oh…no, maybe a half…”

After a few moments of him going back and forth, he notices the “turkey”.

Man: “Oh, (brand) turkey breast…maybe I want some of that. Oh! It’s the same price.”

Me: “Yes, sir. They are both on sale for $2.99 a pound.”

Man: “So they’re both the same price…” *thinking again*

He then looks up at me.
“Well, what’s the difference between the two?”

(I stare at him for a few moments to see if he is joking. He just stared blankly and expectantly back.)

Me: “Well…One is ham…And one is turkey.”

Man: “Oh, okay. I’ll just take some ham.”

(He sounded almost dissappointed, like he was expecting a fancier difference like the way they cooked or something. I think two different animals is a pretty fucking big difference. Or maybe he was pulling my leg and has a great poker face. I hope it was just that or he was really tired and unable to think clearly.)