23 Stories About Customers Who Really REALLY Don’t Want To Roundup For Charity

Dear readers,

It’s a common enough practice at the checkout for the clerk to ask if you’d like to donate to a specific charity drive, usually by rounding up your total to the nearest dollar (or ¥, ₱, £, €, ₪, ₭, ฿, or many others!). We understand that some people are running a tight budget and can’t donate, or already donate to other charities so can’t stretch anymore, and most of these people provide a polite “no” and move on.

And then there are these people, who are so vehemently anti-charity that it makes us wonder if they were personally wronged by them! We’ve rounded up 23 stories of checkout customers who don’t like to… uh… roundup, among other negative views to charity.

Unnatural Attitude – Looks like “natural selection” guy’s plan to be unhelpful backfired.

Doesn’t Understand The ‘A Time For Giving’ Part – This boy’s parents must be very proud.

Homeless Meets Thoughtless – Everyone knows homeless people aren’t people!

Ignorance Really Is Bliss – Have a healthy dose of denial with your denial.

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Literally – Murrica never does anything wrong!

Talk The Talk, Balk The Walk – A valuable lesson in hypocrisy…

Generosity Which Knows No Bounds – Hey, would you look at that? Instant Karma!

An Abundance Of Nuttiness – Hits from the comments: “Jeez, this woman’s really… nutty.”

Yesterday, All My Charities Were Far Away – Anything is possible when you lie.

Altruism, How I Miss Thee – Annnnd the lightbulb goes on!

Needs To Work On His Socialist Skills, Part 3 – Just say “no” and keep walking, comrade.

Paying Dearly – Hits from the comments: “People like that shouldn’t be allowed in public…”

Using The Lord’s Name Doesn’t Deliver – Pretty sure Jesus doesn’t yell at hotel staff, but okay.

Pounding Out A Deal – People don’t shop at charity shops to be charitable, you know.

Celebrity Begins At Home – If I can’t talk to Mark Ruffalo, I’m not donating!

Salvation Barmy – This person’s attitude could use some recycling.

Like Getting Blood From A Stone – I think this one’s a lost cause…

All Karma’d Out – Weird flex, but ok.

Making A Difference – At least it all balanced out in the end.

Politely Decline – The nerve of some people’s children!

Half-A-Brains Don’t Have A Heart – Half-price, half-wit, all jerk.

A Cancer Of Society – One can never have too many stuffed toys!

Must Hate Watching Animal Planet – Oh, good. An equal-opportunity a**hole.

And finally, a bonus story about a customer who still doesn’t like donating to charity but doesn’t get how the system works…

Generosity That Knows No Bounds (Or Much Of Anything Else) – When “No” isn’t in your vocabulary, you have to pay for it.

We hope you enjoyed this roundup about checkout customers who don’t want to roundup (and yes, we realize that sentence says “roundup” twice)! Let us know in the comments if there were any stories we were too lazy to include! Want to send in your own story? Submit your story here!

Check out more roundups here to see if you’ve missed any!