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23 Crazy Stories About Water, And People Who So Stupid Their Brain Must Be Dehydrated

| Right | August 4, 2020

Dear readers,

Dihydrogen monoxide, that amazing stuff that keeps us all alive. We can survive two-weeks without food (or in the case of this editor, only two hours), but none of us can last more than three days without water. This leaves us very confused when considering the following stories, showcasing people who are so easily confused about what water is – or isn’t – that we’re left wondering how they’re still alive.

Please grab a refreshing cup of cold water, and enjoy the following 23 stories from our archives about people who are a bit H2-Slower than the average.


H2-Slow, Part 9 – This is what happens when people don’t understand what water actually does…

H2-Woah – We get it, movie theaters are expensive, but that dihydrogen doesn’t monoxide itself! (Oh wait – it actually does.)

H2Slow – Juice trumps water!

H2O: The Dampening – You need a very dry sense of humor to appreciate this one.

Have You Tried Dihydrogen Monoxide, Part 2 – They’re not ready to hear about the nitrogen, oxygen and argon in our air!

H2-Slow, Part 10 – When ignorance meets boiling point.

Takes One To H2O One – Retail creates alcoholics.

H2Slow, Part 2 – Plastics are sucking up all the water these days.

H2Slow, Part 4 – Well, it DID kill the wicked witch of the west!

She’s Too H2-Slow – There’s too much water in the world!

Driving H2-Slow – “Water Pump Warning Light” sounds like the name of an awesome band.

She’s Too H2-Slow, Part 2 – Puppies cause evaporation!

H2-D’oh! Part 2 – If they think THAT is what water tastes like then what is going on with their home plumbing?!

Going Too H2-Slow – How dare you obey the rules of thermodynamics!

Too H2-Slow To Realize – That joke would have killed on Tatooine.

H2-Slow, Part 6 – Never let this woman own a fish!

H2-Slow, Part 7 – This customer is resistant to knowledge.

H2-Slow, Part 8 – People like this are why diet water is a thing.

H2-D’oh!, Part 4 – How do people get to this age and have never cleaned before?

H2-D’oh! Part 3 – That’s not what they call it in that – nor any – family!

H2-Slow, Part 10 – Brain freeze!

H2-Slow, Part 11 – The ocean is alive, and it remembers that time you peed in it!

H2-Woes – If you’re allergic to water, then you’re screwed!


We hope you enjoyed this sisterly roundup! Any stories we missed? Let us know in the comments! Want to send in your own story? Submit your story here!

Check out more roundups here to see if you’ve missed any!

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