Unfiltered Story #221318

, , , | Unfiltered | January 2, 2021

I have quite severe Asperger’s and also social-anxiety and paranoia: because of this I’m usually wearing headphones and listening to music to block out environmental noise.

I’m in a shop where I’m friends with one of the few staff that doesn’t mind that I’m “weird” and we have some running jokes such as where we pretend to chat each other up in an obviously jokey manner, I should also note that we are both in relationships.

Friend: See you later babe.
Me: You know it.
Customer behind me to her: I can’t believe you have to put up with retards like him.
Friend: My friend, you mean?

The customer is taken aback by the fact she’s defending me.

Customer, pointing to me: Yeah him, you’re obviously funny in the head and probably spend all day playing with knives and will one day snap and end up killing people.
Me: Probably, and if I do, who do you think I’m coming after first?
Customer: See, he just threatened to kill me, I want him thrown out the store.
Friend: Sorry, I didn’t hear anything, these tills are very loud.
Customer: Right, I’m having him arrested, I’m calling the police, and you’ll be fired too.
Me: There are several security cameras on this till and half a dozen witnesses who have seen you commit several acts of disability discrimination and behave aggressively to both other customers and staff: what will you tell them exactly?
Customer: Well, uh, you’re just an idiot that probably talks to the voices in his head.
Me: That’s right, and right now 9 out of the 10 voices in my head are telling me to advise you to sleep with one eye open.

At this point the customer storms out.

Friend: And the tenth voice?
Me: That I want pizza.