Unfiltered Story #216812

(A large booking – of 13 – have come in, from a local touring. Most of them are American, and very loud.)

Me: Okay, are you ready to order?

Customer: Oh, yes, hello. I’ll take the soup. And what does the side salad come with?

Me: You mean the salad bowl? (Just to clarify)

Customer: The side salad! *points to “salad bowl” on the menu”

Me: Okay, a soup and a salad bowl…

Customer: And, what dressings does the salad come with?

Me: Oh, we don’t put a dressing on the salad.

Customer: Well, what dressings do you have?

Me: We don’t *have* any dressings.

Customer: How is it *served* then!?

Me: Well, it comes in a metal bowl, with-

Customer: Does it have lettuce in it?

Me: Yes…

Customer: And cucumber, and tomato, and stuff like that?

Me: Yes.

Customer: Okay, fine, I’ll have that.

Me: Okay, so who’s next?

Other customer: Okay, so I’ll have the soup, and, uh, can I have the side salad with the dressing separate?