Unfiltered Story #214226

(I work in a pizza restaurant. Though the owners pretty much stick to the basic franchisee menu, occasionally some locations may offer an item that we do not. This particular afternoon, I answer the phone and recognize the caller ID. This caller is always very nice, however we just about always run into the same issue.)

Customer: Hi! This is Ms. [Customer], from Ms. [Customer’s] Psychic Reading off of [major highway]. I was hoping to put in an order for delivery.

(I confirm her details and address, and we start the order)

Customer: Well, I’ve got a party going on here, with about 8 girls and 4 adults. I wasn’t so sure how much pizza to get, and I was hoping you could help me.

Me: Sure! Our large pizzas are 16″, and about 8 slices per pie. We usually estimate that each person will have about 2 slices. So for 12 people, I’d suggest maybe starting with 3 pizzas.

Customer: That sounds perfect! If we have any leftovers, I can have it for lunch! Okay, let’s do 2 pepperonis for the girls, and one Deluxe for the adults.

Me: Alrighty, I’ve got you down for 2 large pepperoni, a large Deluxe. Will there be anything else?

Customer: Hmm. OH! Can we also get 4 orders of your Deluxe fries? I just love them so much! They’re so good!

Me: I’m sorry I don’t think I quite caught that. The Deluxe what?

Customer: The Deluxe fries! You know, with the cheese and the pepperoni, and all that good stuff?

Me: I’m sorry, we don’t carry those a our location. We don’t offer fries. It may be the location in [neighboring town that we’re often confused with] that you’re thinking of.

Customer: Well, I know I’ve gotten them from [restaurant] before. It may be the one in [neighboring town]. Do you think they’d deliver to me?

(I look up the distance and see that it’s almost a 25 mile drive.)

Me: Well, you can always call and ask, but it looks like it’d be about 25 miles from your location. We deliver in a 5 mile radius, I imagine they’d be about the same, maybe not more than 10. Did you want to go ahead and place your order with us, or give them a call?

Customer: Well, I guess we’ll just go ahead and order with you, then. I know you guys will deliver to me. I’ll be in [neighboring town] later this week, and I’ll get them then. What other appetizers and sides do you have?

(I help her pick out another appetizer, and we complete the order. As I’m hanging up:)

Boss: [My name]! What took so long?

Me: Ms. [Customer] from the psychic shop down the road, is having a party. She didn’t know what she wanted, and was asking about “Deluxe fries.” I told her we don’t have them, they’re probably specific to another location.

Boss: *deadpan* How did she not see that coming?

(She’s the only customer I ever had ask for “Deluxe fries”, but she’s asked for them everytime she called.)