Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Unfiltered Story #214168

, | Unfiltered | November 2, 2020

I’m in a bank, discussing yet another loan.
I’m also an epileptic that’s fighting to get a temporal loboctomy. I don’t know whether my insurance covers this sort of thing, my insurance company also doesn’t know if they cover that sort of thing. They need a code of some kind, so I can’t know without the code. I’ve been offered to take a loan under very good conditions, so I go to the bank to discuss the terms.

Bank lady: …It’s not very wise to just rank up loans like that if you don’t know the price.
Me: Yeah, but I don’t have a date yet. I have a few more tests to go through and the new fMRI machine died on me. I hear it costs around 75 grand in the US, but 25 grand in Canada, in Canadian dollars. I gather it costs about as much as a decent car, at least.
Bank lady: Do you have a date?
Me: No, not yet. I gotta go through the fMRI prototype and then another step I don’t remember right now, and only then, if they run out of ideas, I get a date.
Bank lady: Alright, I’m sending it to review.
*about half a minute later*
Bank lady: Congratulations, they approved this one too. Fifty thousand shekels will be transferred to your account in the next ten minutes.
Businessman in the boot left to me: You see this?! Why is that f***ing cripple getting approved in ten seconds for fifty grand and I don’t?! These f***ing cripples are leeches! I want to see you not approve my request for ten grand NOW!
*at this point a security guard at least 7′ tall shows up out of nowhere. He practically teleports in and gently puts his hand on the businessman’s shoulder*
Security: Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.
Businessman: This is bulls***! I’m an honest worker and this f***ing cripple is just here pretending to be hurt! It’s some bulls*** story he made up!
Security: Sir, I’m going. To have to ask you. To LEAVE.

The businessman looks at the guard. He’s something between the Terminator, Andre the giant and an actual Merkava Mk2

Security: Quietly.

The businessman looks like he’s about to cry like a scared toddler and leaves.

Bank lady: I’m sorry, I hope your opinion of our service was not blurred by one negative incident.

Question of the Week

Tell us about the most outrageous request a customer has ever made!

I have a story to share!