Unfiltered Story #207140

, | Unfiltered | September 4, 2020

(I used to work for a very well known cathedral which is also a popular visitor attraction and charges an entry fee for sightseeing to help pay for maintenance costs. This exchange happened shortly after the recently discovered skeleton of King Richard III was reburied in 2015. For whatever reason, after 500 years Richard III still has many supporters dedicated to clearing his bad reputation; they also seem to be constantly roaming the country visiting places connected to him, looking for people who disagree with them so they can start arguments and be generally obnoxious. I am selling tickets when this happens:)

Customer: Are there any famous people buried in here? Like kings, and suchlike?
Me: [lists names of notable people buried at the cathedral. They are only famous if you’re local and/or an English history buff.]
Customer: *blinks and looks confused* no I mean real famous people, like Richard III. You wanted him, didn’t you? But [other cathedral city] got him! I’m a Plantagenet, so I know these things! [=he is a descendant of RIII’s family]
Me: Well you know, there is plenty to see in this city even without Richard III.
Customer: I’m a Plantagenet, you know!
Me: Ah, you should really go to [nearby site closely connected to RIII] if you haven’t been already!
Customer: *looks at me like I’ve slapped him in the face, clearly has no idea what I’m talking about* I’m a Plantagenet, you know! I’m related to him!
Me: Yes sir, I know what a Plantagenet is.

(I clearly do not look impressed enough for his liking. At this point his wife, who during the conversation had been buying tickets from me like a normal human being, picks up their tickets and turns to him:)

Customer’s wife [hissing loudly]: SHUT UP!
Customer: But…
Customer’s wife [hissing]: YOU NEED TO SHUT UP!

(She then proceeded to drag him into the cathedral, him protesting about being a Plantagenet while she repeatedly told him that he needed to learn how to shut up.)