19 Stories About People Who Are So Glad They “Don’t Work Here” – A Not Always Right Roundup!
Dear readers,
Picture this. You’re shopping at [Store]. You can’t figure out where they keep those weird little gadgets that do that specific little thing. But, hark! An employee! You approach them and ask them if they know where to find that gadget. And then, they say it: “Uhh… I don’t work here.”
What do you do?
Personally, I think I’d apologize about ten times and then slink home without my gadget to quietly die of embarrassment in my closet. The confused customers in these stories are not nearly so ashamed of their mistakes! Please enjoy these 19 “I Don’t Work Here” stories from the Not Always Right Archives!
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 4 – Ah, the ol’ “pretending to fire them” gambit. Classic.
The Ministry Of Silly Walks – Sing “Walk Like An Egyptian” by The Bangles, but switch out “Egyptian” for “employee”.
Harry Potter And The Disorder Of The Forks-Flicks – How ever you answered my “What do you do?” question above… just don’t do this.
Wii-U Are Not Listening – Wii-U!
Although Most Fourteen-Year-Olds Are More Technically Adept Than Adults – Sometimes, it’s not the customers who are confused.
Can’t Scrub That Look Off Of You – Some people have resting b**** face. Others have resting retail face.
You’ve Got That Company Smell – Retail seeps deep into your bones and never lets go.
Why Not Just Come Out And Say You Own The Staff At This Point… – Worse than those who don’t believe you don’t work here are the ones who don’t care.
Playing The Roll Of The Manager – Well, at least he waited until they were done with their “break”.
Earning Your Dinner – Hits from the comments: “One must lie in the bed he has made, Mr. Owner…” (Credit: Barry Alternative Fact Covfefe)
Sizing You Up And Letting You Down – I’m bad at guessing people’s ages, but what the f***?
Will Get There In Mime – I don’t work here, but I play a mean game of charades!
The Nametag Hag – You’d have to have intelligence to have it insulted.
Thank You For Your Non Custom – Ooooooh, this is an “I Don’t Work Here” with layers!
Sadly That Is The Uniform Response – Hits from the comments: “I’m going to take a stab in the dark and guess that the unhelpful ’employees’ she’s complaining about are all random customers she’s accosted.”(Credit: CS)
Two Can Play This Game, Lady – Hit ’em with the Uno Reverse!
Taking The Call Is Not Their Calling – “Noooo, this is Patrick!”
Needs A Prescription Of Common Sense – Some people will trust their kids’ health to just anybody, apparently.
Doesn’t Want To Interrupt Work With Work – THIS is why no one believes it when people say, “I don’t work here!” We’ve solved it!
We hope you enjoyed this roundup about people who “don’t work here”! Want to send in your own story? Submit your story here!
Some other roundups to check out if you liked this one:
10 Sad-But-True Stories About Customers Who Don’t Treat Employees Like They’re Human
12 Strange Stories About Weird, Odd, Bizarre, And Curious Customers!
