Unfiltered Story #185175

, | Unfiltered | February 7, 2020

I work in a Leisure Centre, occasionally as a Lifeguard. Yesterday I was on Poolside.

Customer to Offside Lifeguard: Your Lifeguards are not telling anybody off for running!

Lifeguard: I am sorry about that sir. I am sure they are being very vigilant about safety.

I was main Lifeguard at the time at the time and nobody had even walked past me, never mind been running.


Customer: I have just cut my foot on this light!

Same Offside Lifeguard: I am so sorry sir. Do you need First Aid.

Customer: No. it’s Okay.


Customer: (To cafe staff) Could I have an orange juice and lemonade?

Cafe Staff: We don’t do fresh orange but I can offer you a lemonade or just an orange.

Customer: God! You are stupid! Okay can I have the spare ribs and chicken nuggets.

Cafe staff: We don’t do either of those but I can offer you goujons and…

Customer: What’s the difference?!

Cafe Staff: Um, well, they are more or less the same but…

She was interrupted by him ordering more drinks which she went off to get.

Customer (to different member of staff). Where’s she gone?

Cafe staff (just walking past, not knowing what is going on) Um, who? Oh do you want drinks?


Cafe Staff: Okay, I will get them for you…

He realised that his colleague was getting the drinks and informed the customer.

Customer: Well, she didn’t tell me that!


He finished in the cafe, yelled at the Supervisor for letting a child bomb (I had just told her not to), screamed at me across the pool for not looking at the pool, proceeded to berate the Supervisor for useless employees and then accused us all for being hungover and that Lifeguards should be ‘checked before being allowed on’.

I had finished my shift at 7 the night before and was at work again at 7.30 in the morning. I had been so tired I had been in bed by 9. Those two hours (according to him) had been very eventful!