Unfiltered Story #185173

, , | Unfiltered | February 7, 2020

(Please understand, I am not proud of this. I work for a hole in the wall pizza joint that turns into bedlam on the weekends during bar rush, with at least 400 orders a night. This is an extremely fast-paced environment and it always has been. I have the misfortune of chasing phones during the height of bar rush, when all of the callers are too drunk to order or sadly sober and angry about the wait time they agreed to initially.)
Me: Thanks for calling (Pizza place), will this be pickup or delivery?
Slurring customer: I want a supreme with no onion, two cheese pizzas, pokey sticks, and a large order of garlic rolls.
(This is not abnormal at all but I can’t actually take any of her order without her customer info.)
Me: That’s no problem, will this be pickup or delivery?
Customer: I just want my pokey sticks please. (I can see the dispatch screen filling up as it auto-refreshes, already on it’s second page, meaning that wait time is already an hour.)
Me: And I can do that for you, but I need to know how to get them to you.
Customer: I just want them. (I overhear the sound of puking, as I look and see that all four of my other lines are on hold with customer calls.)
Me: And that’s fine, but I need to know if you want pickup or delivery.
Customer: (Shrill banshee shriek that I think is to blame for the ringing I’ve heard in my ears since then.)
Me: You may have alcohol poisoning, please call a doctor! (And I dropped the phone back on the receiver in a panic. I take a moment to catch my breath and calm down before picking up the next line.)
Me: Thanks for calling (Pizza place) Pickup or delivery tonight?
New customer: I’ve already been waiting twenty minutes for my food, and when I called a few minutes ago, they said it would be an hour? What the—-
(I panic dropped the phone again and went for a smoke. I needed a moment or twenty. Thankfully, my boss understood.)