Unfiltered Story #184582

(I work on a ferry where many people travel between Finland and Sweden to shop and drink. We deal with drunken passengers on a daily basis, but this customer seemed completely sober. She’s been very nice but has either neglected or disregarded my suggestions or information throughout the entire transaction. Finally, when she’s about to pay, she notices a stack of bottles next to me:)

Customer: *holds up a bottle of a Finnish brand salmiak-flavored liqueur* Is this liquorice wine?
Me: No, that’s a strong liqueur with salmiak. They are mostly used for shots.
Customer: So… It’s liquorice liqueur?
Me: Yes, but it’s salmiak, not liquorice.
Customer: What’s the difference?
Me: Liquorice is a candy flavoured with the extract of the roots of the liquorice plant, and salmiak is artificially flavoured with ammonium chloride.
Customer: But that’s liquorice!
Me: They are both varieties of liquorice, but I can assure you they taste very different. Liquorice wine is sweet, but this liqueur is salty, like the salmiak candy.
Customer: But it’s a wine, right?
Me: No, a liqueur.
Customer: (*shouting to her friend*) I FOUND LIQUORICE WINE! *to me* Is this made by [Brand #1]?
Me: *looking at the large print on the bottle, clearly labelled [Brand #2]* No, it’s [Brand #2].
Customer: Oh, how fussy. Let’s just say it’s [Brand #1] instead.
Me: *fed up* All right. Fine. One bottle of [Brand #1] liquorice wine. Will that be all?

(The kicker? She didn’t even buy the liqueur in the end, because her friend told her she wanted something salty “like that kind of different liquorice” and not “the sweet liquorice wine” I was “pushing on her”.)