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Unfiltered Story #156837

, , | Unfiltered | July 3, 2019

(This summer I worked at a small family shoe store that sells European brands designed to be comfortable and stylish.  Our most popular brand is Birkenstock.  One day, a customer came in wearing a Birkenstock Arizona–the 2-strap style–on one foot, and had toilet paper wrapped one time around the other.  One of my coworkers attended to her.)

Coworker: “Hi, welcome!  How are you doing today?”

Customer: “I just walked from the nail salon a couple blocks from here.  They accidentally got wax in my other shoe and it won’t come out, so now my foot slides around in it and I didn’t want to wear it over here.  I told the lady there I wasn’t going to pay, and that I was going to go buy another pair and show her the receipt and they would pay me the difference.”

Coworker: “(looks at customer’s sandal; it is a color we do not carry) OK, well, we unfortunately don’t have that color, but if you sit down I can measure your feet and I can bring out some other colors for you to try.”

(She does this, and brings out several pairs of Arizonas.  The customer talks quite a bit, saying that she is a college professor, as well as some very strange things…)

Customer: “(tries on a pair) Ha, I can wear these the next time I actually wear a bra!”

(After about 20 minutes, my coworker starts to try to eliminate some of the shoes to help the customer choose)

Coworker: “(picking up a pair) So you didn’t really like these ones, right?”

Customer: “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to correct you.  It’s grammatically incorrect to say ‘these ones’. *smiles* Sorry, I teach English so I’m very grammar-conscientious!”

Coworker: “Oh, really?  I don’t think I knew that!”

Customer: “Yeah, it’s a class marker, whether someone says ‘these’ or ‘these ones!'” (launches into a story about the reason ‘these ones’ is grammatically incorrect)

(The customer ended up buying six pairs of Birkenstock Arizonas, plus a bottle of cork sealant, which amounted to about $630.  My coworker later told me that she was a bit miffed by the comment about grammar being a ‘class marker’, and that she never would have expected this customer to be able to drop over $600 just for shoes.  Can’t say I don’t agree!)

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What is the absolute most stupid thing you’ve heard a customer say?

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