Unfiltered Story #142158

(My stepmother happened to be the customer in this one. After a night of some drinking, she comes home to find her cell phone gone. Immediately, she gets on the house phone to ask where her cell is. I happen to be sitting in the living room at this time.)
Stepmom: Are you sure no one’s stolen it?!
Stepmom: (pause) Check again!
Me: You lost your cell phone?
Stepmom: Yes! And I left it on a drink machine and now it’s gone! I just wanted a [Soda.]
Me: Are you sure it’s not in your purse?
Stepmom: I already checked! It’s not on me!
Me: Did you bring it?
Stepmom: Yes!
(We go on like this for a few minutes before the employee she’s speaking with comes back from their checking.)
Stepmom: In need that cell phone! All of my contacts are in there! (Becoming rude) I’ll go up there and find it! If it’s not there, you’re paying for my new phone!
(She hangs up and drives off angrily to grab her ‘stolen’ phone. Eventually, she comes back even angrier than before. The next morning, I get to laugh because she had it in a smaller pocket of her purse all along! I felt bad for whoever was on the other end of the line trying to keep her calm.)